...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
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