you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize