a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Randomize