ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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