are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
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