That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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