im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
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