The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
