I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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