I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize