Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
