no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
