Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Who did Billy Mays play for?
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
