Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
