His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
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