But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
