these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
