I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
