This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize