Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
