The maid of honor just puked.
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
