You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
