can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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