I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Randomize
