Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Where did you get a picture of my penis
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize