He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
You're like the curious george of whores
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Randomize
