I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I would ride that face into the sunset
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
