Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
These 23 People Had Crazy Sex With Complete Strangers
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
23 Medical Examiners Reveal The Most Disturbing Causes Of Death They’ve Seen
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.