i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize