just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Randomize
