There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
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