I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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