Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
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