Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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