After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
