my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
This is my life. Enjoy the view
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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