If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize