Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
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