How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize