i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Randomize
