just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
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