I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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