Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Randomize
