He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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