Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
We were destined to go to rehab together
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize
