I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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