Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
