have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
