Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize
