I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
