How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Randomize
